thankyou god. it was faith letting me see both of them together. it's a clue for me to give up. from the start, liking him was hopeless, and i myself know that. but now, it seems even more impossible. i give up. thankyou for appearing in my life, and thankyou for letting me love you. they say, "if you love someone, you should let them be happy." all the best, i know you will make a sweet boyfriend.

in this world, ugly and fat people like me won't stand a chance in anything, nothing at all. sometimes even if you're there, you will hardly be noticed. even sometimes when you keep really quiet, no one will even know you're there.

was almost late for school today. my dad fetched maria to school as usual. she met us at red swastika.

had maths early in the morning. suddenly, i think maths is super fun, and it's really easy if you understand and know how to do. i can't believe i failed maths after all these years. D: during social studies, maria was distracting me okay, stand outside my class don't know telling me what. :D. i know she's very jealous i have a quite shuai and muscular social studies teaching while hers is mr chew! TOO BAD. the social studies teacher is really quite shuai and his eyes is so small.

went to find maria during recess. actually we clash into each other at the staircase. she was looking up to find me and i walked behind her and scared her. she say my social studies teacher is cute, of course. ;P. hanged around in the canteen with naufal, amir and syed. then i kept asking maria to count how many moles the three moles guy actually have. ;). wanted to go talk to justin lim wei cong while he was queuing up at the bookshop but i can't believe he was talking to clarence! it's so totally unacceptable. -.-. so walked there and walked away, nevermind. shall have lunch with him some other time. (: loittered around the canteen and i was so high. ;).

chinese totally sucks. almost slept alot of times. some people had to read passages and i was one of the unlucky ones. all because andy shouted LI HUI so loud. want to shout also shout melissa okay. i hate my chinese name because it sounds so wrong, very embarassing okay! i read super fast because i was nervous. in the end, paiseh myself even more, urgh. chemistry was okay, suddenly the class was so quiet, very unusual. art is going to be fun. i think i'm in art, actually i'm not sure since mrs sim didn't mark the attendence. went around the art room looking at art works. i'm going to choose PHOTOGRAPHY for my o levels coursework. might be borrowing justin lim wei cong camera then. (:

met maria at the staircase again. benson talked to maria about choir, make me so left out. -.-. saw - class in the science lab, so walked pass alot of times because maria want to see him. but in the end, only saw his friends, not him. D: so went to tampines mall. bought macflurry, yay. i haven't eaten it for months, i miss it. very very nice. :D. went to popular. and maria stained her uniform with her ice cream, so taught her to carry her bag in front, (: super funny okay, wahahahas. had lunch at the food court. ate naan.

went down and saw ricky, zhenbang, leroy and jasper. so maria and i quickly took the escalator down. i knew it, they went to macdonalds. said hi to them and ricky went to tell zhenbang the nickname he gave me. then ricky said they should make a new t-shirt LITTLE MISS HORNY and paste my face there. -.-. later, walked back again and walked away again. -.-. then i saw -, and he wasn't alone. beside him, was his g-i-r-l-f-r-i-e-n-d. OH. i don't know if i was going to cry, but my reaction was OH. but all i did was kept laughing. i was shocked to see him, and even shocked to... whatever. i am sad, but i just kept laughing and smiling. what else can i do? go up and slap the girl? go up and slap - face? cry in front of them?

went to join the guys at macdonalds. suppose to study with maria, and i took out my pen already, the guys want to go zhenbang house there because jasper want to buy bicycle? so fine, walked there all the way. and oh my god, i think we took about one hour to walk there. the guys were super cute and funny along the way. they went to chase a guy riding a bicycle, who got so scared. then they chase the bicycle guy friend and ran after him, they must have scared that boy. then they went to chase after a chiobu, she so chio. too bad they didn't get her number in the end, D: anyways, they were super funny. the dance leroy and zhenbang did was darn funny and cute okay. it makes me forget about - alot. (: